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By Little Mummy, December 7, 2009 1:25 am

They rolled me into a dimly lit room, as far as I can remember I was the only one in there, I was high on drugs and could make out one nurse rushing around. I’d just had the most surreal moment of my life. I lay there trying to think straight, the nurse brought me water to sip. I could see my husband sitting dumbstruck beside me.

We were in the high dependency unit, there had been complications, with me not the baby.

Erin was wheeled in not long after, Alex took charge of feeding duties, he had the pleasure of nearly all the ‘firsts’. I didn’t trust myself, the medication was strong and my arms felt like jelly. After her bottle I got my first proper cuddle, I made a hook with my arm, for months I had had nightmares about her small frame sliding out and falling on the floor, Alex tucked her up beside me and I looked down.

I inhaled deeply as I thought to myself rather smugly that she was *the* most beautiful baby in the world. I even remember feeling a little sorry for the other mothers who now couldn’t have the most beautiful baby in the world, what a shame for them. In that moment though I was so so proud, I couldn’t wait to show everyone what a great job we’d done!

Out of my drug filled haze and nearly four years on I realise that all new mummys think the same, but I’ll never forget that feeling of pure joy, luck, appreciation and pride.

This post has been entered into the Sleep is For The Weak Writing Workshop (prompt 2)

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By Little Mummy, October 20, 2009 11:42 pm

Because cutting is a life skill…..

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By Little Mummy, August 31, 2009 12:25 am

Erin: I’d like one of the kittens in the case like X at nursery

[Santa's bag's getting pretty full]

Me: Oh well, maybe you should save up your pennies…

Erin: Oooh yeah, how can I get pennies

[sensing an opportunity to teach lesson about the value of money..]

Me: Well you could do some jobs

Erin: [Gives a blank look]

Me: You know, like how Daddy does his job for pennies

Erin: [Excited] Oooh, maybe I can borrow some off him then!

Errr, that went well then

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By Little Mummy, August 21, 2009 6:17 am

Only two days to go and Erin begins nursery. I’m trying not to sound too relieved, but I am. It’s been a long three years and we’ve had lots of fun and I’m glad that I did it (stayed at home)etc etc but I’m looking forward to a bit of freedom, the intensity of the school holidays has definitely worn me down a bit and I’m looking forward to the reprieve of having to provide endless activities and entertainment.

Her teachers came to visit this week introducing themselves and explaining what we can expect on her first day, along with the things we need to take – a completed welcome pack, plimsoles, wellies, spare clothes etc.. It all feels very official and even though it’s not full time and not ‘real’ school, the nursery is inside the school so it still feels like a milestone. The teachers were lovely and Erin has been asking every day if she’s starting nursery today so I’m confident that all will be well.

And me? What will I do with my two hours forty five minutes times five less one friday in two…. Badminton and leisurely lunches with hubby, studying for my HNC, getting my house and garden in order, especially the garden.

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By Little Mummy, June 8, 2009 12:05 am

Erin loves dancing. I promised her last year that we’d start a dance class in the village along from us. Many months of her reminding her playgroup teachers (every day) that she still hadn’t been to dancing was seriously threatening my reputation as a decent mother, so I decided to give her a shot at highland dancing instead, the class is in our own village so no excuses about not having the car, it’s only a five minute walk.

I dug out the leotard with her name on it and her pink ballet shoes, both purchases by nanny who has high hopes of her following in her dancing foot steps. Strange feelings started to come over me, I began to feel a little nervous, would I know any of the other parents, would I show myself up as the newbie, not knowing whether to stay or go, paying etiquette and finally horror of horrors, surely they wouldn’t expect me to join in, visions of a fat flashdance flickered through my mind. I regained my composure, I needed to be strong for Erin, with fake confidence I helped her dress and packed our bag, complete with water bottle, a water bottle would make me look like an old pro, wouldn’t it?

The class was half highland dancing and half tap dancing, Erin wore pink while the rest were all in black, she was the smallest, I won’t lie, I was worried for her. She sat with the group and then the ‘warm up’ began. It was pretty vigorous compared to anything she’s done before, I mean she joins in with ‘boogie beebies‘ but that’s different isn’t it. A few minutes in and I could see she was flagging a bit, and then, breathlessly she shouted across the room “Mum, I’m really tired”. I told her to take her time, she was doing really well, I think I may have given her a few ‘thumbs up’ too, cos that’s what ‘dance mums’ do, isn’t it?

I have to say though she did really well, all the girls knew the dances but she kept up as best she could and did really well to listen most of the time, she did go off on a little solo tangent a few times, and at what point she insisted that she didn’t need help as she knew what to do! The teacher was great too, very patient and made the class a lot of fun.

The class ended and Erin asked if she could do it again, so we’ll be back for another class on Saturday before they break for summer.

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By Little Mummy, December 31, 2008 1:37 am

Mummy: I don’t know if you can tell (!) but you weren’t too impressed with the snow. This photo was taken in January, and as I write this in December you are far more keen on the snow. In fact, I have to try and stop you picking it up and getting your gloves soaking.

Mummy: This is you on your birthday.

Mummy: A really pretty photo, taken on a nice warm day.

Mummy: 60’s fashion is ‘in’ at the moment and you’re right on trend

Mummy: This was taken when we were in Wales

Mummy: Christmas card making 2008, we also made little gift bags and star cookies.

I’m writing this on Christmas Day, and we’ve had a lovely day. You were a little disappointed that Santa didn’t eat all the cookie, but the dolls house and fifi rollerskates made up for it. You’re tucked up in bed now with your new doll.

Love you.

Mummy

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By Little Mummy, May 5, 2007 6:12 am

Erin’s current daily vocabulary;

“Hiya” (not hello)

“Oh, dear”

“Oh, no”

“Oh, yeah”

“Pretty girl/shoes”

“Two” (never one, or three)

“Good Girl”

“ah, ah, ah” or “bah” (when someone, usually me, is being naughty, or telling her off)

“Garden” (to play round and round the garden)

“aargh, baby”

“goggle, goggle, goggle” (I have no idea, either?!)

“Ta” (at least she has manners)

“dog, dog”

“mum”

“dad”

“dad-dad” (Grandad)

What’s more funny, than the words is the expressions!!

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By Little Mummy, April 19, 2007 11:19 am

Erin had her feet measured and received her first pair of proper shoes today.

The picture shows the correct style except we chose white (am I mad?!). Clarks were really good, the fitting was professional and they even took her photo in the shoes and entered us into a contest for two years worth of free shoes, so I make that around 10 pairs!!

Note to self: Don’t buy shoes on days when you could only find the same style of sock, not the same colour, which results in an apology to the staff member for falling short of ‘expected mothering standards’.

Erin (oblivious to my shame) was quite taken with her ‘big girl’ shoes and kept pointing and smiling. Aaahh.

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By Little Mummy, February 7, 2007 3:08 am

Sunday 4th February 2007

Happy Birthday Erin.

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By Little Mummy, January 3, 2007 6:15 am

This month has been ‘choc’ full with christmas, new year and family visits. We’ve laughed, cried and sometimes shouted. You’ve learned to dance and clap. You finally cut your first teeth on new years’ day.