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By Little Mummy, November 12, 2007 10:51 am

I’ve been reviewing the littlemummy archives, I re-read an article that I wrote in the first month after reading a book called Authentic.

The Happy Formula

Almost eighteen months on I still believe that the formula has some substance, but to get the best from it you need to be re-evaluating about once every three months.

So much changes as a parent, everyday the factors involved in true happiness change, our childrens dependancy on us, our need as people -not just as parents- to pursue something other than parenting, and financial issues too. Our income since having our daughter has likened a rollercoaster, there have been many ups and downs. For a while my husband was on a training wage, sometimes I was working part-time, sometimes not, at times we have received tax credits, at other times nothing.

Not constantly re-evaluating is what leads people, especially parents with their ever changing roles and responsibilities to get stuck in a rut. At least thats my take on it.

Are you managing to stay out of the rut?

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By Little Mummy, October 8, 2007 2:12 am

My habit this week from Zen Habits 52 Tips for Happiness and Productivity was to work on accepting what I have.

This is a good habit for me to form because i’m always focusing on the next goal and miss out on enjoying and celebrating the every day pleasures and successes. I dealt with a lot of house stuff last week so my focus was still firmly on the future and the goal of moving, this week I hope I can focus on spending time with Erin and my husband enjoying what we have and the excitement of moving house.

What are you focusing on this week?

Next Weeks’ Habit/Tip: Envision your Ultimate Life

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By Little Mummy, October 2, 2007 12:52 am

I looked into this one a bit more and the suggestions included de-cluttering, simplifying my wardrobe and simplifying my commitments. As I’m moving home soon I’m going to focus on de-cluttering and simplifying our belongings, taking only the essentials and most treasured posessions to the new house.

I have a three step plan in place to ensure this process is completed by move-in day.

First Sweep: Throw, Return and Give Away

The first sweep of the house will involve all areas starting with the biggest challenges, the attic and various store cupboards. We will quickly throw anything that is clearly garbage, broken items, and dated stuff (which doesn’t have a monetary value) from the loft. I expect to find several boxes of belongings that we have stored for family and friends – these will be returned, and at the same time we’ll have an amnesty on items that we have borrowed, a clothes rail, a blow up bed, and crockery to name just a few items off the top of my head. The final part of the first sweep will involve items that we plan to give away, the best of Erin’s baby clothes and equipment will be donated to a young mum who is grateful for all that we can spare, my father-in-law has dibbed any army related stuff, and my sister-in-law may be interested in a few things as she has just set up home with her partner.

All in all I expect this first sweep to clear a lot of stuff

Sell and Replace

The second phase will involve doing a couple of boot sales with some of the good stuff. The money will go towards the move and replacing some items. At this stage we’ll also decide and make an inventory of what is to be replaced, off the top of my head I know we’ll be replacing most crockery, all towels and some bedding.

Pack

Finally I’ll pack everything that isn’t used on a daily basis. The exception to the rule will be Erin’s room, so as not to unsettle her I will leave this until last and pack everything once she has gone on ‘holiday’ with a family member for a couple of days. The plan is to have her new room completely set up before she returns, I hope this will make the move a little easier for her.

Have you moved house recently? Any Tips?

Photo by flickr user the amanda

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By Little Mummy, September 16, 2007 7:46 am

My challenge this week was to think positively. My first test was the maths assessment on Tuesday, I tried not to worry, which I’m usually quite bad for and instead tried to focus on the fact that I’d done ample preparation. On the day I stayed relaxed and tried my best to believe that I would pass. When the paper was being marked I started to think negative thoughts, but luckily it was all fine and I passed.

This week there will be another opportunity to put into practise some positive thinking. We have been viewing houses all week and we have found one that we really like. The rooms are all the right size, it is newly decorated throughout including a newly fitted bathroom and kitchen. It also has the all important garden space we so badly want, although that needs a little elbow grease to get it looking nice. I’m planning to put an offer in tomorrow, lots of positive thinking required!

Wish me luck…

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By Little Mummy, September 9, 2007 12:34 pm

My habit this week, or more accurately the past two weeks has been to get organised. When I looked a little further into what this habit might entail I found that many of the suggestions were tailored around making ‘to-do’ lists. Now, as you well know, I am the master of list making, this skill (obsession?) seems to be rife amongst my fellow parent bloggers…but that’s another post altogether!

So with me already making more lists than is eco-friendly (I know they do recycled paper, what about pens?) or indeed ‘normal’, why am I not already super organised?

I’ve had to face some harsh truths over the last 14 days, like, when you make a list you’re supposed to actually do what’s on the list and, only then are you actually achieving something. Yes, it would seem I had been overlooking this fact, and instead making more lists so that I would create the illusion of organisation (oops).

In short, this weeks’ habit ended up being really straight forward, complete everything on the to-do list before blogging, watching tv, and making more lists! And you know what, it’s actually worked, my house will never be a show home but I have been tackling lots of niggling jobs, clearing clutter and doing outstanding deep clean tasks. I’ve also organised the finances, taken Erin on more outings and ‘play dates’, even my husband has noticed the difference, the other night after a long shift at work he asked “who’s taken my Erica and replaced her with a stepford wife” I’m not really sure if this was a positive statement or not, he seems none too impressed with my rigorous enforcement of the ‘pick up after yourself’ rule. Ah well…men need to be living somewhere that likens a cess pit before they decide to have a tidy round!

Next weeks’ habit: Positive Thinking (this should be interesting, my first maths assesment is on tuesday eek!)

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By Little Mummy, August 26, 2007 12:21 pm

To be honest, when I saw this was the next one on the list, I wasn’t sure whether to do it or not. I’ve never really meditated before and wouldn’t really know what to do, so I decided to simply take some time out to relax, with a view of ‘taking it from there’.

You may have noticed that I have blogged less this week, I stole some blog time to relax and read a book. I spent a few hours over the course of the week laying down quietly in the bedroom just reading, and (ahem) falling asleep. I’m not sure if it was down to this extra ‘time out’, but I have been feeling particularly relaxed and positive even with a constantly niggling absess. I also enjoyed more quality play time with Erin and an increasing sense of ‘being in the moment’ (as opposed to treating every day like a race).

I definitely intend on keeping this type of relaxation up, it seems to be having a positive effect on more than one area of my life, and I think it is time worth sacrificing as I’m definitely getting more done in the remaining time as a result.

Next weeks’ habit: Get Organized – this will be a two week habit as I’m away for a long weekend (yay)

Photo by flickr user frogarythm

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By Little Mummy, August 22, 2007 1:10 pm

To say that this weeks habit was a disaster is…well….an understatement. Why do you think I haven’t released any details of my actual food intake (hee hee). I have the minor excuse of suffering a little with the old crohns, which always knocks my regular eating habit, but I can’t lay all the blame there…

I’ve decided that trying to overhaul my whole eating pattern is just too much to ask, after all, I am a busy parent. I have decided to break this habit down into stages, the first step being to overhaul breakfast. From now on breakfast will consist of a variety of the following;

Fresh juice and/or coffee
Melba Toast with Philadelphia or
Granary Toast with butter/marmalade or
Rice Krispies

I hope that by starting with breakfast I can move onto better habits at other meals too, we shall see.

Next weeks’ habit: Meditate Daily

Photo by flickr user awrose

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By Little Mummy, July 29, 2007 10:50 am

This weeks challenge was to lose weight, or more accurately try and eat more healthily and do more exercise which would result in weight loss. I have kept a diary of my meals, calorie intake and exercise to see exactly where I can improve.

Monday

Breakfast: 1 slice wholemeal toast & butter, coffee

Lunch: 5 cocktail sausage rolls, carrot sticks, cucumber sticks, 3 strawberries, 5 walnuts, glass of OJ

Snack: 1 donut, 2 cocktail sausage rolls, coffee

Dinner: Pork escalope wrapped in parma ham (baked), low fat creamy veg (baby corn, sugar snaps, carrots with tbsp creme fraiche warmed through), glass of OJ

Supper: 1 donut, coffee

Calorie Count: 1826

Exercise: None

This was a mixed day. I switched back from sugar to sweetner in my coffee and ate more vegetables than usual. Monday is our shopping day so we usually have a treat, hence the donuts.

Tuesday

Breakfast: Rice Krispies, Coffee

Lunch: Small cheeseburger, small fries, 2 mozzarella bites, small irn bru

Dinner: 6 cocktail sausage rolls, glass of OJ

Supper: Club sandwich (chicken, bacon, lettuce, no mayo), carrot sticks, coffee

Calorie Count: 2059

Exercise: 20 minute walk

Ouch (have you seen that calorie count!) Today was so bad I actually thought about ditching this weeks challenge, however, I’ve decided to stick with it, it’s such an eye opener!! Definitely going to try harder tomorrow.

Wednesday

Lunch: Slice wholemeal bread, 1 slice of ham, 2 cocktail sausage rolls, carrot sticks, glass orange squash

Snack: 2 french fancies, coffee

Dinner: 3 chicken wings, 4 cocktail sausage rolls, glass of OJ

Supper: Coffee

Calorie Count: 1790

Exercise: 30 minute walk, 1hr Wii Tennis

Not a great day, I’m glad the sausage rolls are finished!

Thursday

Lunch: Cheese & onion toastie, glass of OJ

Snack: Crisps, squash

Tea: Steak & onion ciabatta, side salad, glass of OJ

Supper: Coffee

Calorie Count: 1486

Exercise: 40 mins Wii Tennis

Today was quite good calorie wise I think, but I need to eat more fruit and veg.

Friday

Breakfast:Rice krispies, coffee

Lunch: Grilled chicken breast, roast potatoes, leeks and red onion with parmesan, glass of OJ

Snack: Glass of water

Dinner: 1 slice peanut butter on wholemeal bread, coffee

Supper: Rice krispies, coffee

Calorie Count: 1068

Exercise: 20 mins Wii Tennis

Today was quite good but I think I should have eaten a bit more, maybe some fruit would have been good.

Saturday

Dinner: Quiche, large salad, glass of squash

Supper: Coffee, 4 chocolates

Calorie Count:1524

Exercise: 15 minute walk, 30 minutes Wii Tennis

Today was ok, I think I need to find some fruit that I like though.

Next weeks’ habit: Exercise

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By Little Mummy, July 22, 2007 1:14 pm

This weeks’ habit was patience, in particular being a patient parent. Erin is on the verge of starting to push the boundaries, which I’m sure in turn will start to ‘test’ my patience, at the moment though I don’t find myself losing my patience very often.

My plan for dealing with the pushing the boundary phase is to be firm but fair, pick my battles, and treat tantrums with the move the furniture place them in the middle of the room stand back and wait for it to finish rule. If I’m out then it will be one warning and then out of the shop (or wherever) to somewhere I can use aforementioned approach. I’ll let you know if it works…

My problem areas now when it comes to patience, is wanting everything to happen now. This week I’ve tried to relax and accept that things will happen, but it can’t all happen right now and I need to go with the flow, safe in the knowledge that in general we are heading in the right direction.

This week hasn’t been the greatest week for testing this habit overall as nothing has really happened, I’ve been quite relaxed and even went on a girly overnighter!

My Verdict: I’m definitely going to try and be a little more laid back in general, and I think being a patient parent is a virtuous aspiration too.

Next Weeks’ Habit: Lose Weight (not quite a habit but worth pursuing if you need to, I’d like to slim down a little)

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By Little Mummy, May 19, 2007 9:00 am

Inspiration for this group of articles (listed below) comes from Jack Canfield’s bestseller – How to Get from Where You Are to Where You Want to Be. I am taking the principles from the book and applying them to life as a parent.

The inspiration for this particular post was based on the book’s take on how to ask for things in general, as I’m focussing on the principles from a parent’s perspective it was easy to come up with what we need to ask for most – help.

When you’re a couple you look after yourself, and do your fair share (hopefully) of the housework. When you become a parent there’s another person to look after, sometimes one person reduces work commitments and before you know it your in a muddle over responsibilities, chores, and who’s earning the (most) income. Inevitably friction ensues and it takes some months to find your rhythm as a family. Well, that’s how it has played out for us anyway.

I have found myself needing to ask for help much more often, help from my husband, help from family and occasionally help from friends, not easy for someone who is fiercely independant.

The book provides some great pointers on how to ask for things, I’ve tailored them a little to suit us parents;

1. Ask with a positive expectation

If you are going to ask you may as well not be too apologetic for it. I’m pretty bad at this, I always feel guilty for asking, especially if it’s family or friends, I feel like I should be able to manage it all myself, of course it’s not possible.

2. Ask someone who you think can say “yes”

For example you may already know that one set of family members are busy at the weekend and quiet in the week, and the other side of the family are vice versa. Tailor your babysitting requests to fit with other people’s lifestyles where possible, you’re more likely to get a yes.

3. Be clear and specific

I used to feel that I was nagging my husband all the time to help with housework, he would counter by saying that he was helping. The problem was that I was being too vague with what I wanted him to do and the kind of help I needed. He was always saying that he was doing what was asked, which he was. When I asked him to take the rubbish to the bin he did, two days later, if I asked him to do some cleaning he would wash the dishes. Now I say things like “please take the rubbish out tonight before bed” and “please could you clean the floor in the kitchen, do the dishes and put a laundry in”. I ask for exactly what I want and if need be when I would like it done by, and 99% of the time I get it. I’m happy because I’m receiving help and the house is tidy, he’s happy because he isn’t being nagged at. Simple.

Feel free to add your own tips for asking for help…

Other Articles in the Series:

Compartmentalizing Time
Remember Your Purpose Outside of Parenting
Aim High
Get Organised
Be One Step Ahead
An Hour Of Powerful Parenting