I’m currently studying business studies with the Open University and have come across an interesting concept which I’m sure at least some of you are aware of that has piqued my interest. I have quite a strong interest in personal development (stop snickering at the back, yes I’m talking to you englishmum and Laura) and have read several books on the subject so I’m quite surprised that I haven’t come across this theory.

The theory I’m wittering on about (if anyone is left) is Maslow’s hierarchy of needs.

The theory goes that each level of the pyramid must be completed or ‘fulfilled’ before you ascend to the next level. The level above where you are on the pyramid is what motivates you.

I think we can take a parenting angle here, I think we are concerned with our children in the same way. Once we have cleaned and fed them and secured their safety we can turn our attention to socialising them and beyond that enrolling them in all sorts of clubs and activities to build self esteem, and if we can get past busying their schedules they may even have some time for some self-actualisation of their own!

Back on a personal level I think the pyramid is kind of a two way street, a bit like snakes and ladders. If a lower level on the pyramid is not fulfilled then you slide back down to fulfil that level before you can return your attention to the upper levels.

I think I’m probably at the highest point I’ve ever been, hovering between esteem and self-actualisation. Once you reach the dizzy heights of self-actualisation this is said to be more of an experience than a goal. The more you ‘self-actualise’ the more the desire is flamed, if that makes sense. Self-actualisation is the process of fulfilling ones potential, this doesn’t solely relate to work or money but comes more from within a sort of inner assurance that develops with age, experience and I guess the process of self-actualisation.

Characteristics of Self-Actualised People

* Realistic perception of self and external world

* Ability to focus on solving problems outwith their own being, this may involve charity work, volunteering etc..

* Focus on developing their individual potential

* May appear unconventional in their words and actions, they aren’t merely a sheep so their thinking may seem ‘out of the box’

As with many theories Maslow’s hierarchy of needs has proved controversial, criticism of Maslow’s work has focused on whether there is a hierarchial order to our needs at all.

Your thoughts… don’t be shy, throw them out there. Do you agree with the theory or disagree? Are you surprised by where you fit on the pyramid…do you think it can relate to parenting in any way?

Background Story

A woman who smashed a glass bottle into the eye of a man, leaving him partially blinded has escaped jail as she claimed that only she could look after her baby as she is breastfeeding. The woman’s health visitor said that she didn’t know how the baby would react to formula or feeding from a cup or bottle.

Although woman are able to give birth in prison and care for their babies there, this scenario is not allowed post birth.

The Sherriff handed down a sentence of 300 community service hours rather than a custodial sentence.

Do you think that women should be allowed to escape a jail term if they are breastfeeding?

There are so many issues surrounding this situation that I thought it would make an interesting discussion.

For starters there is the fact that the woman has assaulted the man with serious consequence and would usually receive a jail term and therefore is it fair that she has been given a more lenient sentence because she is breastfeeding? I believe that punishments should always be served otherwise what kind of judicial system are we running here.

On the other hand is it fair that the child suffer because of the actions of the parent, if as the health visitor has implied that stopping breastfeeding and switching to formula would unsettle the baby, or is that something that the mother should have thought of before she assaulted the man. Personally I don’t think the child should suffer (if indeed that were to be the case) for the actions of the mother, so I guess I’m in a no win situation.

Very complicated, do you think the sheriff made the right decision?

What do you believe is the right course of action, and if the crime were more serious again, then what?

Reported in the Sunday Mirror

“Anger over sheep slaughter” the BBC reports. Some parents are up in arms over the slaughter of a sheep that was raised by school children on a farm.

One mother says that she feels it’s wrong to kill the animal and it’s the equivalent of boiling up the family pet for dinner.

Here’s a short clip of the headteacher speaking out on the issue.

A discussion has been taking place on facebook, many parents believing that the headteacher is admirable and that there’s nothing wrong with teaching the children where their food comes from. On the other side there are a couple of people that are less happy, one person believes that they can teach children the same lessons without the practicalities of killing and selling the meat to re-invest in other animals. Another who eats meat because she doesn’t like anythingelse is uncomfortable with the reality and although is happy enough to eat the meat does not want to have the ‘death part’ in her face.

I think there are a couple of issues here;

1. Is it ok to eat meat but not be prepared to face the reality of where it comes from?

2. Is it ok for primary school children to be taught in such a practical way how a farm works and about the production of meat?

Let’s take point one;

I’m a meat eater and I believe that if you’re prepared to have an animal killed for your own consumption you need to be prepared to face the reality that the animal is reared to be killed for food. If you’re in anyway uncomfortable with that then you should be considering whether you should be a vegetarian. Just my point of view.

Point two;

We’re far to quick these days to wrap our children in cotton wool, I agree with the headteacher these children are learning several valuable lessons (farming, entrepreneurship, decision making) and let’s not forget it was the children who voted 13-1 to have the animal slaughtered, who are we to stifle their learning because of our own hang ups? The animal was not a pet, it was reared on a farm in a farming community. This is life, we can’t pretend that meat just appears in plastic packaging in Tesco. This scenario will allow those children to make informed decisions on whether as adults they will pursue a diet that includes meat.

What do you think?

I’ve been planning the family’s evening (main) meal ever since I first moved out of home at age 17. I’ve found it to be a useful practise that has helped keep our meals fresh, in the interesting sense, and fresh, in the literal sense too, ingredients can be purchased in the correct quantity and stored appropriately ie chicken for a meal later on in the week can be frozen. I always leave one day free which allows for meals out/takeaways or family invitations. If none of the above materialise then we eat leftovers, or from a reserve of ‘freezer food’.

I usually plan several weeks ahead, taking inspiration from magazines, cookery programmes and books that I have. Recently though I’ve been wondering if there are any ways to improve on my current routine.

If you’re a meal planner how do you manage breakfast, lunch and snacks?

There’s been a lot of coverage recently about an impending recession, the american mortgage crisis, and the rising price of food and fuel. Is there anyone who hasn’t given at least a quick thought to their monthly budget and looked for where they could trim some fat? I have, and I’ve also been wondering how I’m doing with my food budget compared to everyone else. This isn’t an opportunity for one upmanship, I’m actually more interested in finding those who are spending less, and how?

Please answer the following questions either on your own blog (and link here, so I can find you) or in the comments.

Here are the questions and my answers.

1.) Predominantly, where do you shop? Tesco

2.) How often do you shop? Weekly

3.) How much (on average) do you spend? ?60(this includes household products and nappies)

4.) How many people are you buying for? 2 adults, one infant

5.) Do you do any of the following – meal plan, make a list, have a budget? Yes to all

6.) If at all, how have you tried to lower your spending on food and household items? I started meal planning and buying online to keep my costs down, recently though I have had to increase my budget from ?50 to ?60 as I was really feeling the squeeze.

Thanks for taking part.

In 2008 my family will begin to experiment in recycling, growing our own produce, reducing our energy consumption, perhaps becoming a little greener, more organic, and hopefully more self-sufficient.

Most of us know of the awful reality of caged egg-laying hens. Back in November after a bit of research I decided that the time had come to move to barn eggs, this month after further reading we have moved to free-range eggs. I wanted to offer a quick run down of the information I have gleaned whilst making the decision for my family.

There seems to be four categories, eggs from caged hens, eggs from hens that reside in a barn, free-range eggs, and finally organic eggs. Here’s a brief description of the conditions for each type of bird;

Caged

Hens are housed in stacked cages with the equivalent of an A4 sheet of paper in which to move around. The warehouses are usually without windows and the birds have no access to outside space. Caged hens produce 66% of the UK’s eggs.

Barn

Hens can roam around their barn but are not let outside, they are provided with perches, platforms, nestboxes and litter areas. Birds can share a barn with up to 16,000 others. 7% of eggs produced come via the barn system.

Free-Range

Birds are kept in barns with outdoor range space available for a minimum of eight hours a day. 27% of the UK’s eggs are free-range.

Organic

Hens producing organic eggs are always free range, they are fed an organic diet.

Price of Eggs

Eggs from Caged Hens (pack of 6) – £0.73

Eggs from hens reared in Barns (pack of 6) – £1.12

Free-Range Eggs (pack of 6) – £1.28

Organic Eggs (pack of 6) – £1.75

All prices are for medium eggs and are taken from a leading supermarket beginning with ‘T’

So there we have all the information required to make a direct comparison. As you would expect the price of the eggs increase as the conditions for the hens improve. The caged hens produce the cheapest eggs, free range hens are the most expensive and organic is really in another choice bracket altogether. The organic egg producing hens enjoy the same lifestyle as the free range hens and the only difference is the organic feed and organic land where they reside.

On learning of the awful conditions of caged hens, I decided that we could afford the move to barn eggs. We eat a box or less of eggs a week and that meant the difference was around 38p a week, or less. On first glance the price difference does seem fairly large (relatively) however when you look at the difference in living conditions I feel it is justified. This month whilst doing the weekly shop I was surprised to find that free range eggs were only 12p more than the barn eggs. We have now moved to free range, 12p is a small amount to pay to know that the food we are eating has come from an animal that has enjoyed as normal and comfortable a life as possible.

I expect to be making these decisions on a fairly regular basis over the next year as I investigate the benefits of living a greener, more sustainable and organic lifestyle. The dilemmas will come when we start to talk in pounds rather than pennies. Balancing the budget with the ethics is going to be an interesting challenge, but for now, the decision is pretty easy, a few pence more for a substantially superior product is going to get a yes every time.

Which eggs do you buy? Is your decision based on ethics, price, or both?

Information sources;

http://www.vegansociety.com/html/animals/exploitation/hens.php

Photo by flickr user LynnInSingapore

Being a younger mum (24), I still have many personal ambitions, especially on the academic and career side. Over the past few months, I’ve found myself in the sometimes difficult position of trying to balance family and parental needs with my own personal needs. I love being a stay at home mum, but there is a part of me that still requires a higher level of mental stimulation and ambition outside of being a good wife and mother. My own interests lie in pursuing further academic qualifications to enable me to move into a career which is more in keeping with my passions – children, teaching and education.

My inital plan was to return to college for one year and then do a vocational degree at university, this would have meant that my daughter would be cared for by a blend of myself, my husband, family and either a nursery or childminder. However it’s become clear that this plan is not right for us, mainly because we do not want to rely on outside care ie childminder/nursery.

Since Erin was born I have taken responsibility for the lion’s share of her care, I enjoy nurturing her and am proud that she is receiving such a lot of influence from her family and I want to see this continue. Like most women, and perhaps humans in general, I want to have my cake and eat it. I want to be a full time stay at home mum, available to take Erin to mother and toddler group and then next year to playgroup, on hand to do the school run etc.. however, I also want to ensure that when the time comes I have given myself the best possible chance of picking up a decent career in an enjoyable field.

My situation, like all parents, is constantly changing and my current solution is to attempt to gain a degree through the Open University. Their system is very flexible and all the course work can be done from home. The degree courses are split into units, with each unit having a credits value, you basically collect 360 credits for the ful degree. Of course each unit also comes at a price, around £300 for a 30 point unit and £560-£620 for a 60 point unit. Yup, it’s going to be quite expensive, although, it’s not as bad as it first seems. I receive £200 a year from ILA Scotland and apparently I am eligible for a seperate grant of up to £200 per unit (unconfirmed as yet). I’ll try an accumulate the small amount I make from this blog which should help with the balance, all in all I think it’s do-able, and at the moment seems to be the best solution all round.

I’d love to hear from anyone that has done, or is doing a degree with the Open University

The recycling pro’s amongst you may be thinking I’ve got muddled up with the ‘three R’s’ message, however, this is the learning curve I’m on at the moment.

We’ve gone from recycling nothing. Nothing. We literally chucked everything into (non-recycled) bin liners and heaved several loads down the four flights of stairs several times a week. Aaaah how things have changed!

We arrived at our new home to find bins strewn all over the garden in brown, green and grey. Inside, on the kitchen counter was the recycling timetable, with a colour co-ordinated calendar advising which bins would be emptied when. At first glance it seemed like a mish mash of lines and colours but it soon became clear that it basically goes blue, grey, blue, grey on alternate weeks until the summer months when the brown one is emptied every 2-3 weeks.

The blue one is for recyclables – paper, plastic (not bags), cardboard and packaging. The grey one is for other waste, the brown one is reserved for garden cuttings. There’s also an optional extra in the way of a composting bin.

I launched myself into the recycling with gusto, alloting and advising the family on the different refuse areas (a basic bin/bag system, I’m planning to purchase a three tiered refuse system very soon!) The first week was fine, this week it’s clear that we need to heavily reduce our packaging, the blue bin was full by Sunday and is not due to be emptied until Wednesday, we’re simply having to stockpile rubbish until then, when the bin will likely be filled straight away!

Time to look at reducing our packaging, here’s what I have planned, further suggestions would be greatly appreciated…

Buy in bulk – go to Costco and buy dishwasher/laundry tablets, liquid soap, shampoo etc.. in bulk.

Use our own containers – buy liquid soap, shampoo etc and decant into our own reusable containers.

Cook from scratch – pre-packaged meals are just that – packaged, and it’s taking up valuable bin space, bye bye ready meals.

Grow our own – growing our own herbs, vegetables and fruit would mean no packaging at all for a portion of our weekly food.

Buy from farm shop – purchase unpackaged ingredients from a local farm.

I had the rare opportunity last week to catch up with current affairs. I ended up watching about half of David Cameron’s annual speech to the Conservative Party. There were a few interesting points, along with quite a bit of fluff, one of which was the idea of a National Citizens Service. It would be a voluntary affair aimed at young adults between the ages of 16-18, designed to be a transition to adulthood, a ‘coming of age’ if you like.

It’s not a bad idea, well, not completely. It’s clear that Cameron is jumping on popular opinion that ‘proper’ National Service wouldn’t do any harm to the hoards of neds (aka chavs), he’s just doing it in a more namby pamby way. For a start it’s voluntary. Is he expecting the knife weilding, buckie drinking louts to form an orderly queue? I think not. Most likely it will be the ‘middle class’ that will be the uptakers, the public school kids that see this as yet another way to boost their bulging records of achievement. For this to have any impact at all, it needs to be these three things;

COMPULSORY

EXTENDED (6 WEEKS?)

RESIDENTIAL

No ifs, no buts, and no damn medical certificates.

According to You Want to Do What? the criminal age of responsibility, or the age at which people must take responsibility for their crimes is ten in England and Wales, and eight in Scotland.

These ages are very young, especially when they are compared with other countries. For example in USA the age of criminal responsibility is sixteen/eighteen, in Germany it’s fourteen, France thirteen, and Italy fifteen.

My question to you is, at what age do you think the criminal age of responsibility should be?

Personally, I think twelve sounds like a good age. At twelve, a child’s morals should be well ingrained, they should easily be able to distinguish between right and wrong, even if under peer pressure.

What do you think?