End of an Era
Erin starts school in August and there’s a sense of change in the air at Chez Douglas. Thoughts are slowly turning to school uniform and the prospect of whole days sans child are looming large. I’ve been a stay at home mum for over four years, by the time Erin is full time at school it will be almost five years since I left my 40 hour a week job. I’ve picked up and dropped a couple of part time jobs along the way but my role has always been that of a full time, stay at home mum to Erin.
It’s been hard.
There was the year living in a top floor flat and getting out for a walk meant scaling four flights of stairs with my completely impractical three wheeler buggy. There were the days when I was ill with crohns and felt that I didn’t have the energy to look after myself let alone another. There were the days when it was me hanging off Daddy’s leg begging him not to go to work. And then there were the tears, because sometimes it’s really hard to just give all of yourself to the pursuit of parenting with little stimulation for yourself.
But it’s also been a privilege, I’m aware that I’ve been extraordinarily lucky to have been afforded the time I’ve had with my daughter, time that now it’s almost gone has actually been little more than a blink of the eye. I listened to her first word, I witnessed her first steps, I was there at her first nativity play, I’ve done it all and I have the memories to prove it.
We’ve had to sacrifice this and that along the way to make staying at home work but it’s been worth it. I’m looking forward to being a bit more ‘me’ and a bit less ‘mum’ but I’m sure as quickly as I have that I’ll miss being at home with Erin too because the grass is always greener which is why I intend to fully enjoy these last few months together and make them the best ever, because it won’t be long before I’m waving her off wondering where the baby years went and wishing we could spend long days together playing play-doh, baking and dare I say it watching cbeebies together.
Oh bless. It is hard when they start school but she’ll love it – and it makes the time you have together after school, at weekends and in the holidays even more precious. xxx
That’s lovely, it’s wonderful that you have such happy memories of the time you’ve had with her – and when she goes to school there will be more, different times which are equally wonderful. Have fun in the mums’ egg and spoon!!
Thanks Liz, we’re both really ready for this and I have my Uni place lined up so it’s not like I’m gonna have much time to dwell on it.
Erika (nice name by the way), don’t, I’m quite competitive so she’ll end up dreading the mum’s race, I’ll be there barging people out the way and generally being embarrassing!
What a beautiful post… Charlie also starts school in August, and as much as I’m looking forward to being able to launch myself into my own business, I know I’ll miss the impromptu baking sessions, shared weeding (not that one!), trips to the loch, etc, etc, etc.
What I’ll miss more are all the things we just never seemed to find time for – 4 schleps to and from school, fitting in lunch, making tea, hanging out the washing: all add up and conspire against us.
I too am going to make the most of this very special “last” summer. Thank you for the reminder
Dotty – It’s nice to hear someonelse having a similar experience, I hope you have a great summer
Oh dont, I am in denile. Mini starts full time in September as Maxi did last year. I am clinging on to my last vestages to full time motherhood with no dignity at all!
TheMadHouse – Do you have any plans for once their both at school?
Heck, that takes me back! It goes by so fast. My ‘baby’ is off to senior school in September and it only feels like a week ago he was starting at the wee village school (class size = four). Jxxx
No plans as of yet, I need to look for some paid work really, as we have made lots of sacrefices for me to be off with them and our finances are in dire straights!!
I feel honoured to have been able to spend the first years of their lives influencing them and enjoying them oh so much
ah, it does go so fast, doesn;t it. My mum still remembers the best years of her life as the few she spent at home with us. She also enjoyed going back to work as a teacher when we went to school though. Very best of luck with the next phase of your life!
What a lovely post. It does go fast, but it’s wonderful. I still have a couple of years before my littlest guy starts big boy school!
PS I thought I should start stalking, oops I mean following you if I may end up meeting you when you come to Tampa! =)
Can’t wait to come back to Florida, I need some sun
Aww it goes so fast doesnt it, my boy will be starting at the school nursery (mornings) in September, so I will be left with only one full day a week with him (he sees his daddy on Saturdays) its strange to see him growing up and away from me already when it hasnt been that long since he couldnt do a thing for himself. Good luck with the Uni, and have a lovely summer x
Thanks Mary, I have to admit I do enjoy that couple of hours of nursery time to myself.