Being a younger mum (24), I still have many personal ambitions, especially on the academic and career side. Over the past few months, I’ve found myself in the sometimes difficult position of trying to balance family and parental needs with my own personal needs. I love being a stay at home mum, but there is a part of me that still requires a higher level of mental stimulation and ambition outside of being a good wife and mother. My own interests lie in pursuing further academic qualifications to enable me to move into a career which is more in keeping with my passions - children, teaching and education.
My inital plan was to return to college for one year and then do a vocational degree at university, this would have meant that my daughter would be cared for by a blend of myself, my husband, family and either a nursery or childminder. However it’s become clear that this plan is not right for us, mainly because we do not want to rely on outside care ie childminder/nursery.
Since Erin was born I have taken responsibility for the lion’s share of her care, I enjoy nurturing her and am proud that she is receiving such a lot of influence from her family and I want to see this continue. Like most women, and perhaps humans in general, I want to have my cake and eat it. I want to be a full time stay at home mum, available to take Erin to mother and toddler group and then next year to playgroup, on hand to do the school run etc.. however, I also want to ensure that when the time comes I have given myself the best possible chance of picking up a decent career in an enjoyable field.
My situation, like all parents, is constantly changing and my current solution is to attempt to gain a degree through the Open University. Their system is very flexible and all the course work can be done from home. The degree courses are split into units, with each unit having a credits value, you basically collect 360 credits for the ful degree. Of course each unit also comes at a price, around £300 for a 30 point unit and £560-£620 for a 60 point unit. Yup, it’s going to be quite expensive, although, it’s not as bad as it first seems. I receive £200 a year from ILA Scotland and apparently I am eligible for a seperate grant of up to £200 per unit (unconfirmed as yet). I’ll try an accumulate the small amount I make from this blog which should help with the balance, all in all I think it’s do-able, and at the moment seems to be the best solution all round.
I’d love to hear from anyone that has done, or is doing a degree with the Open University
7 Responses to “Balancing Motherhood and Personal Ambition”
Hi Erica, I can understand the position you are in completely.
I did a business degree at the University of Surrey and then started a psychology degree with the Open University. I completed two modules with the OU but then decided it was not the path I wanted to go down.
I found the Open University excellent, very professional and well organised. You would expect this from a university of course but in my experience they are not all like this. At Surrey the marking scheme was changed half way through the course which was quite infuriating. The lectures also striked on one occasion. That certainly never happened with the OU.
The OU’s course material was excellent. It is expensive as you say and it can take a lot longer to complete a degree course. I found it hard work and have to admit my degree at Surrey was a lot easier. It is also difficult studying a lone but I’ve completed a lot of distance learning courses and would definately recommend it.
As for the OU - read all the material so you know exactly what is involved, especially in terms of weekly study hours before you commit yourself. But based on my own experiences I’d definately say - go for it! A friend of the family did her law degree with the OU whilst a mother of 2 young children and is now a lawyer! It’s a lot of work but worth it if you are able to do it.
Thanks for taking the time to respond ingenious, it’s great to get some insider info.
I had a good look at the course, it looks like I’m commiting to around 10-12 hours of study a week (to start), therefore I’ve been quite particular about what I’ve chosen to study, there NEEDS to be a high interest factor
This ramps up to 16 hours next year (when Erin will be in playgroup and then nursery), I’ll also have time while Alex is on backshift - I guess it’s one of those things you can’t really be sure about until you’ve tried it. I’m trying to look on my monetary contribution as if it were a hobby, I’d have to pay for classes and equipment and I guess this is the same sort of thing - fingers crossed the blog will cover the overflow!!
try out a few 10 pointers first to see if there’s an area that really lights your fire (and racks up a few points along the way) OR if you look on
http://www.open.ac.uk/openlearn/home.php
for a taster of some of the units from a good selection of courses. It’s free so you can safely sample a lot of different courses without wasting money.
I’m about to start my second level 2 course and am currently wading through a preliminary read of the set texts to make it easier when it ocmes to study them properly (I need to do this as otherwise I spend too much time struggling with the words when I’m meant to be laerning - it’s a Dyxie thing)
It’s wonderful that you have your priorities in the right order. Being a mom, whether very young or older, is a very demanding job but is also the most rewarding overall. But that does not negate the passion and desire women/moms have to build their knowledge and experience, as well as opportunities outside the home.
I must applaud you in your very grown up attitude. Pursuing your career goals in open university is an excellent choice, allowing you to gain the needed skills, while still caring for your home and child. Congratulations on your goals and well thought out methods.
I’m a mom of six, although mine are all grown now. I know all too well the difficulties involved with what you discuss here. Good luck with it!
Great to see this issue highlighted - I think about it on and off a lot at the moment. So do many mums I know. On the one hand, the baby/toddler years are slipping away so fast and I want to be with our daughter as much as possible in this precious time.
But, like you, I have dreams and ambitions of my own I want to pursue. It’s a tricky one to reconcile the two. Though, I must say, Beanie genuinely seems to enjoy her two days at nursery, which gives me a good section of time. But even now she’s settled there it can be a wrench to spend the time apart.
I don’t know what the answer is. The more time I spend with her, the more I enjoy being with her. But I don’t want to give up my dreams, not least because I don’t want her to feel pressured into living them out for me when she’s older. I feel constantly torn and don’t have any answers!
Good luck with the OU course. You owe it to yourself to give it a go - you have so much potential. I know you can make a success of it.
Hi Erica
Fred did a Maths OU honours degree taking six years whilst working full time. We jiggled everything about a bit and it worked. has he stopped studying now Innes is here? No chance - doing Accounting now through the OU.
Erin is beautiful and you have done a great job so far - don’t give up your dreams!!Susan
Hey Susan, good to hear from you
Hadn’t realised that Fred did the degree through the OU. I’m just rejigging now after moving etc. and this seems like the best option all round. Great to hear that he is going on to do another course - that’s commitment, and with a full time job too - definitely makes me feel that I’ll be able to fit it in.