Comments (5) As you know I have bought a new house exactly 9.15 miles from where I live now, which means a change of catchment area for both primary and secondary schools. I’ve done some research on the education in the area;
Is there anythingelse I should be checking out at this stage?
I feel like I’ve come to a bit of a sticking point with littlemummy.com, visitor numbers have become static and I feel like I need to push the site on a little – I need your help.
Why do you read littlemummy.com, what are your favourite articles/features? What don’t you like, what do you skip over in your rss feed, what should I drop? What new features/topics/articles would interest you?
Would you be interested in any of the following;
Video
Podcast
Guest Writer
Prize Giveaways
More Reviews (toys/books)
Please throw any ideas you have at me, I’m all ears – I need some inspiration. I’d be grateful if everyone could add something to the conversation no matter how small, the more voices and opinions the better, hopefully we’ll see a pattern and it will be clear where to go from here.
Photo by flickr user LiminalMike
I’ve hit on a particularly interesting section in ‘You Want To Do What?: Instant answers to your parenting dilemmas‘ which covers morals.
The question was posed “When do children begin to know what is right and wrong?”. The section goes on to explain that there are three levels of development, preconventional, conventional and postconvential. Children in the preconventional stage, up to aged ten, are concerned with meeting their own needs whilst avoiding punishment. It is clear why this age encompasses the sneaky behaviour of toddlers, hiding behind sofas to draw on the wall so they won’t be caught and thus receive punishment, and why older children will lie to ‘get away’ with things.
The next phase is the conventional stage whereby children are more concerned with living up to expectations and fitting in with familial and societal ideals. This stage runs through to adulthood where behaviour is adjusted to suit environment and the relative behaviour of others. One no longer needs to live up to expectations but behaves in an appropriate manner for the occasion, this works on the basis of a social contact, i.e treat others the way you expect to be treated etc..
Going back to our children, many of which will be in the preconventional stage, it’s our job as parent to guide them into the conventional stage, the main difference between the two stages being the emotional element. In the second stage the child is capable of understanding how their actions affect others, they are also able to demonstrate a certain level of emotional empathy.
Understanding this main difference between the stages is key. It’s easy to identify that the best way to teach toddlers and primary aged children (5-11) good morals is to take the approach of encouraging emotional empathy. Of course there should be punishment, but first there needs to be an explanation of how the action has affected the emotions and wellbeing of the other person/s. In a way the action itself is less important than the way it had an impact on the other parties.
Moving on to the punishment, is a smack really the most appropriate punishment? If the exercise is to teach emotional empathy then surely helping to solve the problem or reversing the action (ie cleaning the mess) and ‘making it up’ to the affected parties is what is really important when it comes to encouraging children to have good morals.
You may have read in my last post that we have bought a house. We currently live in a flat in Edinburgh so this will be a big change. The new house is just outside Edinburgh and finally we’ll have our longed after garden – front and back! We now have the task of selling our own home which has involved a spot of decorating and getting people in to fix niggling faults. It’s been a busy time but it goes on the market today, so keep your fingers crossed.
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I enjoyed this post at GNMParents about afterschooling. It covers how to take a simple activity or game and extend it so that it becomes educational too.
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I’m a little late as this is last weeks carnival of family life, still, it deserves a big shout out.
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Check out my articles page (which I will be updating soon) for the best of littlemummy.com.
One major thing I’ve done in the last year to simplify my finances is to get a flexible mortgage. This type of mortgage allows you to overpay and take payment breaks. All excess funds go into a savings pot which is offset against the mortgage lowering the interest to be paid, and, in turn reducing the monthly payments. I like the fact that we can build a cushion in the savings which we can use to take a break if something happens and we could do with a month off, the savings can also be used for home improvements.
Last Monday we put an offer in on a house, on Thursday we upped that offer and am pleased to say that it was accepted! In this situation I am now finding further benefits to the flexible mortgage as you can just transfer the mortgage to a different address, no need to reapply, as long as the amount you need to borrow is within your upper limit it’s simply a case of changing the addresses.
What have you done recently that has simplified your finances?
Next Week’s Habit: Simplify my Life
Photo by flickr user cristina101
I am currently reading/reviewing ‘You Want To Do What?: Instant Answers to Your Parenting Dilemmas‘. I was surprised to find that in the section about ADHD, instead of the sympathetic advice usually offered, there was a completely different viewpoint, one I am still pondering now.
In short the book warns to beware of a diagnosis of ADHD or ADD…
“The term ADD developed after several years of mislabelling for children who failed to conform to what were probably idealistic standards of learning and behaviour. Such children were considered to have minimal brain disease (MBD), which later became minimal brain dysfunction, when no ‘disease’ could be diagnosed”
This is a brief but interesting history into how the terms ADD and ADHD have come about. It got me to thinking, could it really be possible that these children are just at the top end of the energy scale i.e they need a lot more exercise and output than the ‘average’ child.
Furthermore would it be reasonable to suspect that as society has changed these children no longer fit our definition of ‘normal’, maybe it’s our way of life that is the problem and not the children. I bet if you asked your grandparents how many kids they knew that had been diagnosed with an attention deficit related illness their answer would be none, now however, everyone knows someone who has a kid with such a diagnosis. Would that be because it didn’t exist or they merely saw it as kids being kids? Have we become intolerant of children needing to let off steam?
In years gone by children burned energy by going on day long bike rides and playing sports for hours on end, we all had a very physical childhood with plenty of opportunity to ‘burn off’ excess energy. I remember when I was younger being told to go out and burn off some energy, because if I didn’t my mum new she’d have her hands full with a couple of hyper kids with too much energy. It’s not like that now, it’s all about gadgets and computers, kids don’t go out and burn off the excess energy, in addition there is less physical education at school and shorter playtimes. Might it just be possible that there is no illness at all, but that the way society has developed has forced these used-to-be-normal children to be seen as extreme, hyperactive, suffering with an attention span that is deficient?
Apparently one third of school boys aged five to eleven now suffer from ADD which is defined by behaviour that is fidgety and impatient, which pretty much renders most children as having at least a little bit of ADD and at least a few adults!
One of our societies answers to the problem comes in the form of the drug Ritalin which reduces fidgety behaviour. The book suggests that more natural ‘cures’ might include a better diet, more exercise, less television, more sleep and goes on to suggest that even our school system could be partly to blame – “children..forced to sit still in a classroom…with large numbers of other children”, perhaps a more physically active school day could help too.
What do you think? Are these titles just merely buzz words from the 1990′s as the book suggests or is there more to the illness than just having a bit too much energy? I’d love to hear your thoughts…
Paula (a fellow british parent blogger and sponsor of littlemummy.com) sent us a sample barefoot book called ‘Bear About Town‘.
The first thing I noticed about the book was the vibrant colours, the cover is green, orange and pink, and they aren’t sickly shades, they look natural, which fits with the barefoot ethos. The books are designed to present “strong artwork”, “strong stories”, and be “multi-cultural in the best way”. You can see from the other titles at barefoot especially for the older kids that they stick to their word.
The second thing I noticed was the quality. This book feels solid, it is a board book and the pages are glossed, and talking of pages, for a book aimed at toddlers there are more pages than your average equivalent.
The story follows bear on the various destinations he visits during the week – the bakery, the swimming pool, the cinema, the gym, the toyshop, the park, and the playground. This book would make a great and even more unique gift if you were to wrap it with the promise of doing the same as bear did for the week!
You can buy barefoot books direct from their website, which I found to be very user friendly. You can view a few of the pages of each book as a taster to see if you like it.
Erin’s achievements this week have included counting to six, drawing on my shoes, saying “sausage” and “bubbles”, drawing on the highchair, completing a jigsaw alone, drawing on the wall, occupying herself in the morning with a book while I wake up, drawing on her toy kitchen. Are you following the pattern? The toddler phase is definitely a series of highs and lows!
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We have been occupied viewing several houses, of which we have made offers on two, no word yet though. Our own flat goes on the market on monday and I have a few jobs to complete this week including laying the rest of the bathroom floor, touching up some grouting, painting the hall, glossing surrounds and organising an electrician and domestic appliance workman to do some odd jobs. To say that we are busy here is a bit of an understatement. Needless to say the blogging may slow a touch while we focus on matters closer to home.
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If you’re new here, and I know a few of you have found my site via blogrush, here are a few highlights from the archives;
Stencilling with Doilies Activity – this one is prefect for preschoolers.
Baby Games – inspiration for doing something fun with your baby.
It’s the perfect time of year to go bark-rubbing.
My challenge this week was to think positively. My first test was the maths assessment on Tuesday, I tried not to worry, which I’m usually quite bad for and instead tried to focus on the fact that I’d done ample preparation. On the day I stayed relaxed and tried my best to believe that I would pass. When the paper was being marked I started to think negative thoughts, but luckily it was all fine and I passed.
This week there will be another opportunity to put into practise some positive thinking. We have been viewing houses all week and we have found one that we really like. The rooms are all the right size, it is newly decorated throughout including a newly fitted bathroom and kitchen. It also has the all important garden space we so badly want, although that needs a little elbow grease to get it looking nice. I’m planning to put an offer in tomorrow, lots of positive thinking required!
Wish me luck…
Erin had her first gymnastics class on Saturday. It’s held at the local gym, I was impressed to find they had all the miniature apparatus like mini bars, beam and vault. Erin tried the bars and the vault, the beam was a bit too much for her – hopefully next week. At only £3 a session I thought it was quite good value, especially in comparison to similar organised gym based activities. I’ve booked for a further six weeks, the olympics here we come! Oh dear, I think I’m turning into one of those pushy parents…
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The Carnival of Family Life is up now. My highlights this week;
Who’d have thought watching an apple rotting in a picture blog could be so entertaining, might have to try this one when Erin is older, even though it is a little unusual.
I also enjoyed vacations that work with extended family. Here are some more pointers on holidaying with family, I wrote these following a fun holiday to the Lake District.
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And finally, please check out my post at British Parent Bloggers if you’re considering starting a blog – Get Your Own blog in 3 Easy Steps
I'm a 27 year old mum to 4 year old Erin. We live just outside Edinburgh in a small rural village.
I've been blogging for four years and write about anything and everything that takes my fancy.
Above is me with my beloved Ernie in Port Aventura and left with our love child in Florida.
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