Being a good parent is surely better than trying to be a perfect one.
The inspiration for this post comes from this article - Top 5 Ways To Stop Being a Perfectionist
Set Realistic Expectations
For me, realistic expectation in a day includes keeping Erin clean, safe, fed and clothed. I try to provide at least one activity a day which can be a simple excursion to run an errand, a trip to the park/soft play/friend’s house, or an indoor activity like painting or getting a special toy out. Most days I provide home cooked food but on occasion the food may come from a tin. I try to limit ’screen’ time, but sometimes I do resort to a dvd if it’s particularly hectic. She always has clean clothes, if we are indoors, sometimes they aren’t ironed. We have a bath most nights, unless we are running very late.
I think these ’standards’ are just fine. The odd dvd, tin of baked beans and sausages, missed bath time, un-ironed joggers is surely better than a mother who is completely frazzled and constantly snapping?
Give Yourself Credit for What You Have Accomplished
They are still alive. You must be doing something right.
Their sole survival depends on us, if they are thriving then we are doing a good job. Everything they know we have taught them, when you think about it that’s pretty amazing!
Accept That Mistakes are Part of The Journey
We aren’t always going to get it right. Accept when you get it wrong and move on.
If You’re Stuck Seek Help
Doctors, health visitors, magazines, internet, family - I have consulted all at one time or another.
Focus On The Present
This is my favourite tip of all. Life is fast, too fast, take some time out to enjoy the moment tomorrow. You aren’t going too look back in twenty years and wish you didn’t spend more time with your kids.
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6 Responses to “Stop Trying To Be a Perfect Parent”
These are great! I need to really take them to heart, because I feel guilty about too much. And my daughter is happy (SO happy, it’s ridiculous sometimes), healthy, and you’re right…she’s still alive! LOL!
I beat myself up when I get upset with her, but maybe I get upset because I’m trying to be my version of perfect. As a single mother, I have to give myself credit for being “on” almost 24 hours everyday. And give myself permission to want time to myself (so it’s okay to put her in the playpen for 15 minutes with a toy).
Thanks!
[...] Erica Douglas presents Stop Trying To Be a Perfect Parent posted at Littlemummy.Com. [...]
Iron? You sometimes Iron your child’s clothes? Wow, if I were the guilty-type I would really feel guilty. I iro nothing - it’s a policy of mine. If a squirt bottle and a spin in the dryer doesn’t work the offending item of clothing gets sent to Goodwill or an unsuspecting friend.
I think parents really need a little naivette and idealism to make it through, I wrote a story about it, http://traceesioux.blogspot.com/2007/05/expectations.html .
But, give up the guilt - it’s wasted energy. Just another nasty emotional habit, like this story I wrote about self-righteous anger http://traceesioux.blogspot.com/2007/02/go-bratz-go.html .
[...] Erica Douglas recommends we should Stop Trying To Be a Perfect Parent posted at Littlemummy.Com. I agree, “good enough” is better than perfection, and might actually be acheived. [...]
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[...] We often try to be everything to everyone, at the sacrifice of ourselves. Erica Douglas tells us to Stop Trying To Be a Perfect Parent at LittleMummy.Com. [...]